Not gettin anywere fast

Thought i better update this as i've not done it for a while,

its now October and my weight is back down to 46kgs, i dont want sympathy or anything i have been tryin but its so hard when you dont have an apppetite, things were oki when i started this food diary on here but then, i got started on a 3 week course of oral antibiotics for mrsa which is in my sputum, when i started them i was oki the first day then for the next week and a 1/2 i was being sick a few times but the sicky feeling was always there which affected my appetite aswell but i was told they could do this,

I phoned my Cf team to tell them how these were makin me feel and was told to stop on of the anti b's, but the sicky feeling was still there and i was only eatin one meal a day i know its not good for anyone never mind a person with cf, even my overnight feed wasnt staying down so i wasnt doing that either, i just feel i'm fighting a losing battle right now my chest is fine at the moment but i know if i end up with infection i have no back up weight to fight it, these tablets have been stoped now, I was also in wit a stomach blockage too only an overnight but i still dont have an appetite and i hate it, no one understands me when i say i'm not hungry but guess they'll never really know as there not me,

My team did suggest starting me on Megace to try bosst my appeite and weight but nothing has been said again, so i'm gona phone them tomorrow I cant go on like this no more.

sorry for the rant but i thought this is wat blogs are for too.

Thurday: Yesterday wen a got up a was ma usuall coughin had to take another sickness tab so a wasnt sick, gav maself half hour to rally round befor havin ma cereal, ma appetite still isnt any beta a still dont feel very hungry at all even tho am tryin,

Lunchtime came stacey came down after work for a, i had a packet of crips n thats all a had, So wen stace went away a went upto ma aunt jan's for a while cos a hadnt seen her since she came bak her holiday, sat out in the sun it was roastin n this was at back of 4 5 o'clock, so sittin out the in the sun, jst chattin bout ther holiday, and befor a came home a had a orange vodka wit fresh orange juice lol was nice, anyways befor a came home a went to asda for juice and bought 2 packs of cold meat, I had a pack wen i come in thinkin my bread was gona be oki little did a know it was mouldy guess a shoulda check'd it befor a went out, so a jst had a pack befor txtin stace to say a was gona got bed the heat made me tired, so a went to bed bout half 9 slept for 2 hours befor wakin up in 2 wit my stomac ii could hardly move was so sore, so i took 2 nurofen & 2 paracetamol, i didnt get back to sleep till bout 12 or jst after it,

Friday today haha: I woke up to day didnt hav ym to eat anything as i had the dentist but thats anonther blog lol, i've only had new boiled potatoes and a rib roast steak from the buchers which i cooked myself, now sittin munchin ice'd gems lol i'll do my feed before i goto bed

I got up today as stacey was coming down this mornin, was ma usuall nearly sick wit coughin, i've not had much to eat the day at all not been feelin like it think a maybe block'd i hope not,

I've try'd a little bit tho, usually i would make a fry or something like it for me n stace but none of the 2 of us felt like it, anyways wat av had today is, 5 little packet's of iced gems, cadbury's caramel, plate of cereal, 2 piece's on speardin cheese, and i'm sittin eattin veg pakora as a type, hopin ma stomac is oki tomorow, i'm gona do my feed tonight to get that started again, but i'm not gona force myself to eat still if i dont feel like it as long as a try thats all i'm bother in bout jst now

I have to get my weight up past 46kg

Oki today is the start of my online food diary, due to my weight fallin below 48kg :( the problem is i have no appetite, so i'm startin this diary to keep tabs and follow my own eatting patterin's

today i have had 2 peice's on cheese, 2 packets of crisps, then tonight dinner, which was boiled potatoe's and 2 chicken breasts boiled too and pint of milk.